


With Forgiveness Comes Progress

by Robron101



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Actual conversations, Angst with a Happy Ending, Forgiveness, M/M, Robert Sugden can really break your heart sometimes, Struggling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-27
Updated: 2017-05-27
Packaged: 2018-11-05 09:20:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11010522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Robron101/pseuds/Robron101
Summary: “I haven't shown it. I've been so busy working on forgiving you, that I forgot with forgiveness comes progress and I didn't do that part. I didn't show it. I'm so sorry.”





	With Forgiveness Comes Progress

**Author's Note:**

> So I've sorta been on hiatus from the Robron fandom, completely stopped watching ED but I kept up with spoilers and everything. I was waiting for the reveal to see if I could accept what's happened, and Maxine the Queen sucked me back in. I watched the reveal episodes and after I was done, I found myself at peace with everything and finally found a way to move on and continue watching and writing. So this is a happy fic, (thank God I've been so freaking bitter.)

It happened a week after Robert came clean. They were in the kitchen together, Aaron just having hung up his phone after saying a goodbye to Liv. Things between them have been strained, which isn't surprising after what they've gone through, and with Rebecca revealing she's still up the duff made things even more stressed between them. Even through all of it, Robert wanted to be close to Aaron, always wanted to be close to Aaron. So after he's put his phone down on the kitchen countertop, he's crowding into Aaron's personal space and grabbing him by hips, reaching hungrily for Aaron's mouth with his own. 

Robert gets in one swift kiss before Aaron's pulling away and pushing Robert away at the same time. Robert makes a noise of protest, but goes anyway. “I can't,” Aaron whispered, “I just - I just can't Robert, not yet.” 

And if that doesn't fucking break Robert's heart, because how selfish can Robert be? After everything he's done, of course Aaron needs time to cope, time to accept and try to forgive him. Of course he doesn't want to touch Robert like that right now, it must remind him of what Robert did since it's so fresh in Aaron's mind.

“Of course,” Robert tells him, stepping back to give Aaron's space, “take all the time you need.” 

Aaron gives a quick jerk of his head before skirting around Robert and going upstairs. He'll give Aaron the space he needs, won't push it or force anything. He wants it to be completely natural and real between them when they're intimately together again.

Robert will wait. 

****

Three months go by since that afternoon in the kitchen when Aaron told Robert he needed time. Aaron's not sure but at some point between that time, Robert's given up. Not on Aaron, just on ever getting somewhere with him. He stands dutifully by Aaron's side, is always attentive and caring, never pressuring Aaron for more and he knows Robert is staying faithful. He never looks at anyone else, never gets caught in a lie, and the extra long morning showers and sexual noises that drive Aaron away from the bathroom door tell Aaron he isn't going behind his back with someone else. 

Aaron's tried, just because he hasn't made a move doesn't mean Aaron hadn't tried. He's thought about it, making that move towards Robert, letting him touch him and kiss him and do all those things that used to make Aaron's blood run hot; but now when he thinks of those things with Robert it's like someone poured ice water all over him because he pictures all those things he and Robert do together, but in place of him, is Rebecca. 

How is he supposed to be with Robert sexually when all he can think about is Robert and Rebecca together sexually? Whilst he has come to terms with Rebecca's pregnancy and him staying with Robert while supporting him through this, he still can't fully forgive yet. Maybe things will be different when the baby is born and he can see Robert holding his son or daughter, maybe then forgiveness can really begin. 

Now on Robert giving up, Aaron's not sure of when it started but he didn't take notice until about the third month in. Every morning Robert used to wake up and turn to Aaron expectantly, hopefully, but each morning Aaron would ignore or roll away and Robert would nod to himself before getting up and starting the day. At nights he'd curl around Aaron, wouldn't make any moves on Aaron, but the tension that rang through Robert's body told Aaron plainly he wished Aaron would start things with him. Now Robert doesn't turn to him in the mornings anymore and whilst he still wraps himself around Aaron at night, Robert's body is calm and relaxed and he goes straight to sleep after a kiss and a goodnight. 

Aaron can't tell if he's relieved or worried. 

During this time, Aaron has stood by Robert through it all. It's been hard, at times almost too hard, but he keeps at because he knows he has to. He loves Robert and he wants them to be together, so he tries and fights and keeps working at and everyday he finds himself forgiving Robert a little bit each day. 

Aaron's at work, they've hired another person at the scrap yard because their workload doubled over the summer and they could afford too. The young lad they've hired, Marshall, showed up in the village two months ago and befriended Adam and then Aaron. Robert doesn't care for him, says he talks too much and watches Aaron too closely. Aaron doesn't notice it, he hasn't tried anything with Aaron and he thinks Robert's being paranoid. He doesn't say that though, doesn't feel he has the right to after everything that's happened. 

The door of the Portacabin opens and in walks Marshall, smiling like always. He's twenty, young and vivacious, always smiling and cracking jokes. It's infectious and Aaron finds himself smiling to mirror his. 

“All done, boss man.” He greets Aaron, plopping down at the chair next to Aaron's at his desk. “I think I can go the rest of my life without stripping out another bloody copper pipe from a water heater.” 

“Copper is good money, and you'll be happy to know Adam went on a run to pick up another six today.” Marshall groaned and dropped his head down on the desk, Aaron chuckled and patted him consolingly on the shoulder. “If I can get through this paper work today I'll be able to help you tomorrow.” 

“You're too good to me,” Marshall says and sits up, smiling widely at Aaron. His smile takes up his whole face, his Cupid's bow and upturned nose makes Aaron think of innocence, like he wants to protect Marshall from all the bad things in the world. “Wanna get drinks at the pub later, your mum's doing that special.” 

“Can't. Robert and I have plans,” Marshall's smile dims and Aaron feels the need to rectify that, “but tomorrow, sure.” 

The smile comes back, “Alright.” And then Marshall does something that shocks Aaron, short circuiting his brain for moment. One moment he's smiling and then the next that smile is pressed against Aaron's lips. It was too eager and full of nerves, and so surprising Aaron doesn't pull back for a moment which was a mistake because Marshall apparently takes that as a good sign, moving in closer and taking Aaron's face in his hand, prying Aaron's lips open with his tongue. 

Aaron feels a jolt in his stomach, but it isn't from Marshall. The way Marshall grabs Aaron reminds him of the way Robert used to do it, and Aaron suddenly wants Robert so bad he aches with it. Finally, Aaron gets his wits about him and grabs Marshall by the shoulders and shoves hard, Marshall's lips come off with a slick wet sound and Aaron hadn't realised he'd shoved that hard, but Marshall winds up sprawled out on the floor, having slipped off his chair. 

“I'm married,” Aaron shouts. “What, why, how… answer all of those!” He stutters it out, too shocked to ask a real question. 

“I-I like you, Aaron. A lot. I thought it would be okay.” 

“What gave you that idea?” Aaron wiped a hand across his mouth, not the slightest bit sorry at the way Marshall scowls at the movement. 

“Aaron,” he said his name like he was indulging Aaron and, yeah, Aaron felt insulted. “I see the way you and Robert are together, it's like you're just getting by because neither of you want to be alone. It's like nothing's really there. I know what happened, people talk in this village, and what Robert did to you was awful. You deserve better than him, and I could be that.” 

And that hits Aaron hard. Is that really how people see them, do they not even seem to be in love anymore? Aaron _loves_ Robert, but he's realising he doesn't show it anymore. He doesn't want that, and right now he can't imagine what's going through Robert's mind, and he needed to know. Right now. 

“I have to go,” Aaron said and stood up, walking around Marshall who was still on the floor and out the door. He drove to The Mill as fast as he could and was glad to see Robert's car out front. 

“Aaron?” Robert said surprised, turning the TV off and sitting up straight, body tense. Aaron stops because he realises in that moment that Robert's terrified, Aaron coming in flying like a bat out of hell has scared Robert. _He thinks I'm finally going to throw him out. How long has he been waiting for this, living with it?_ “What's happened?” Robert asks softly, like he doesn't really want to say the words. 

“I love you,” Aaron says, he sits down next to Robert, as close as he can without actually sitting in his lap. “I love you, okay? And I'm sorry I've let you think that I don't.” 

He grabs Robert by the back of the neck and pulls him forward, smashing their mouths together almost painfully. Robert's a bit tentative at first, almost like he's too surprised this is happening but he recovers fast and his hands are on Aaron's face, and he's kissing Aaron back likes he's been starving for it, for him. 

They kiss until Aaron can't breathe anymore, his lungs burning with the effort to continue. He breaks away panting, Robert the same but he doesn't let Aaron go, and Aaron doesn't want him to. Robert stares into his eyes, panting and licking his already bruising lips and he looks so wrecked it makes Aaron's stomach swoop in a wonderful way it hasn't in awhile. 

“I know - I know you love me,” Robert whispers. “Why did you think I didn't?” 

“I haven't shown it. I've been so busy working on forgiving you, that I forgot with forgiveness comes progress and I didn't do that part. I didn't show it. I'm so sorry.” 

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Robert says and kisses him softly. “I was - I thought maybe you weren't coping, that you - you might want me to leave.” 

“I don't want you to go. Ever.” 

“Good, because I don't want to go.” Robert wraps his arms around Aaron, hugging him tight and Aaron holds on just as tight. 

“I have to tell you something,” Aaron says and waits for Robert to pull back. “Marshall kissed me.” 

“What? He - he kissed you?” Robert tried to pull away, but Aaron didn't let him, he was sick of them pulling away. 

“It meant nothing. I pushed him away, and reminded him that I'm married. But, I guess in a way it woke me up. He said something to me that kind of shook me.” 

“What did that very, very dead man tell you.” Aaron raised an eyebrow at that and Robert rolled his eyes and sneered. “Fine, I won't kill him but I won't be held responsible if I deck him.” 

Aaron just shook his head and smiled fondly. “He told me that me and you, we don't seem to be in love. That we're just together because we don't want to be alone. But that isn't true. I love you, I love the bones of you. I'm not with you just because I don't want to be alone.” 

“Even if that was the case, I'd still stay with you.” Robert said quietly, “I'll take whatever I can get with you.” 

“But it shouldn't be like that Robert. I want you here and I want you to know that I want you here, and I haven't done that.” 

“You have now,” Robert cupped the side of his face. “I've really missed us, the way it should be. I want you, Aaron. All of you.” 

“I want all of you, too. I really do.” Aaron kissed Robert again, licking into his mouth and Robert grunted causing Aaron to feel it in his spine, the pure rush of arousal making him feel light headed. Aaron pulls Robert closer, and falls backwards onto the sofa, pulling Robert over top of him. 

“Are you sure?” Robert pants against the skin of his neck after breaking the kiss, and Aaron can feel him shaking and he _wants._

“Robert don't you dare stop,” Robert looks up at him and whatever he sees has him nodding and dipping back down to kiss him, like he could never stop kissing him. 

It was good, fantastic, maybe even perfect. It was just Aaron and Robert, no one else, no dark thoughts or images. Aaron enjoyed every moment and then some, taking and giving just as Robert did. When they were spent, satisfied and cuddled up on the sofa, Robert finds his hand and links their fingers together. 

“I love you,” Robert says, kissing his temple. 

“I love you, more,” Aaron says back and feels Robert smile against his head. 

Forgiveness isn't easy, but when you give it, you get so much in return.

**Author's Note:**

> This was going to be a smut fic but then I felt like nah, I want this to be more about them talking and being able to be okay again. Cause isn't that what we all want? As much as I love to see Danny's acting skills with his phenomenal crying, I could go the rest of my life without Aaron crying on screen ever again. It kills me.


End file.
